Been thinking a lot lately about people who try to live holy lives, but who never want take on any holes.

Just a theme I’ve been seeing a lot of lately.

WARNING: This is explicit. There’s at least 10 swears, including 7 f-words. If that’s the kind of thing that bugs you, you shouldn’t read this. (And if you’re disappointed for these words running through my head on a loop while I walked my dog, then just imagine my disappointment for the whole experience!) Based on a true audition.

I was watching Welcome to Wrexam and a guy said something like, “When you step back and look at the big picture, you can see nothing lasts forever.” I liked the sentiment and the cadence, so I just played around with it, and somehow the woman I love crept in.

Based on a true lack of an amen.

“Sometimes the Bible in the hand of one man is worse than a whiskey bottle in the hand of another.”

Based on some true legs.

Can you even belong in the divine family—or any family—without a nickname?

Based on something I saw while staring out the window and thinking of the attempted assassination of Donald Trump.

Obviously I have abandonment issues. Whether it’s fair to conflate those with my relationship with God is currently being internally debated.

Based on a true patio.

Based on a true father. Probably based on all the true fathers. At least half.